Tails from the Curtain Rod

The day began as days usually do for a cat like me. Although I must say, the dreadful heat in this sultry town seems to be gone for a season. It is October I suppose, which is my favorite month. My coat is solid black and I am therefore an interesting participant in the traditions this time of year. While I have no belief in superstition, I find the habit of crossing paths quite entertaining, as the keepers, both young and old cannot resist averting their steps to avoid me. They are quite comical actually, but I digress. I spent the day napping, chasing that bothersome blue jay that torments me endlessly, napping some more and then searching for something to eat. My keeper feeds me well, but it is my nature to hunt, so I hunt.

As I wandered the neighborhood, it came to my attention that a certain garage door was partly open. Just enough so, that I could slink into the garage to check for, well whatever cats check for. At any rate, for whatever reason, I gave into the temptation and found my way into the garage. It looked as if it had been organized at some point but had lost its way recently. While there were no mice to chase, there was a blanket. It had seen the test of time, and proved itself worthy of my afternoon nap. As I dozed, I considered the consequences of my softened vigilance, for it is not my constitution to relax so in unfamiliar territory. However, the comfort of the blanket and the solitude of this quiet garage were simply too inviting. I napped.

Upon awakening I found myself in a most precarious situation. You see, the partially opened garage door, had, during the course of my respite, been completely closed. I considered my situation and elected to wait. The door was bound to be opened eventually and if there was anything I had, it was patience. I waited.

The house became quiet. It occurred to me that the keepers within had retired for the night and would not be opening the garage door anytime soon. I began to investigate my surroundings and found that the door leading to the house had been left ajar and was indeed passable. I entered and again began to survey the location. The setting was familiar. There appeared to be young as well as older keepers in the residence. But suddenly my eyes set upon a suspicious object. A recently filled water dish was placed neatly in the corner. I became aware that I was likely not a lone quadruped in this environment. My senses were awakened as I continued my exploration. All of a sudden, I heard it. The sound from behind one of the closed doors was clearly NOT feline. It was, in fact, canine in nature. I made haste in my attempt to abandon my surrounding, retreating in the direction that I had come. However, it was too late. The keepers, evidently curious as to their canine’s agitation had released the animal and it was obstructing my path. I turned and ran toward what appeared to be an exit. It was, however, closed and I saw nowhere to go but up. Up the curtain panel I clawed. The ascent, however effortless was futile as I was now “treed” if you will atop a most narrow rod that appeared to hold the curtain. I watched.
The commotion attracted the keepers. At first it was only an adolescent, a female. She immediately summoned another keeper, apparently named “Mom” and presently they both stood staring sleepy eyed at their captive. I was confused at their intent because as suddenly as they realized my predicament they put the canine away, imprisoned behind the door. But they followed up by waving a long armed brush in my direction. As my defenses instinctively kicked in, I growled and hissed in every direction to let them know of my desire to deliver myself from this situation on my own terms. I jumped frantically to the mantel and down to the floor, attempting once again to leave this desperate situation following the same course that I had entered it. This time it was the adolescent that blocked my path. I circled back, toward the window, and thinking that it had been opened ran full force into it. You can only imagine my embarrassment as the keepers could not contain their laughter. Upon regaining my bearings I once again climbed the curtain panel to find myself in the exact same circumstance that I had been not 2 minutes before. However in my hustle to scale the drapery, I disconnected the rod and found it to be hanging haphazardly just below my position.

At this point, another keeper, named “Dad” entered the room. He appraised the situation briefly and then returned to his nocturnal deep breathing. I continued to grumble my displeasure as I watched the two female keepers discussing their options and finally appeared to have decided on retiring as well. But not before first leaving the door obviously open and pointing one of those cursed black boxlike devices that randomly flashes bright lights, directly at me, several times. Before I die I would like to know just what purpose those infernal things serve except to temporarily blind their subjects. I watched as the keepers left and waited until I was certain they would not return. I carefully disembarked the curtain. I escaped.